Thursday, September 13, 2012

Bus Labia Live Blog

Hey Readers! All 5 of you! 

Today I thought I'd do something a little bit different, a live blog! WOW!

I'm currently on the bus and said, Hey, why not?

There's nothing really interesting happening on the bus right now, it's 12.09am and the only thing to look at is the 50-odd year old woman's laptop screen in front of me. 
What's she at, you ask? Why just casually looking at a picture of her clit piercing, and checking her profile on some swinging site. You know, all good things to be doing on public transport. It's really not helping my motion sickness. Her puss-puss looks like it's seen better days.
AUGH she just enlarged the picture! 
Current plan: How to sneak the little emergency glass-breaking hammer out of it's holder and into my eyes. 
Seriously, she will not stop clicking on the picture of her puss-puss piercing! 

Wow sudden situation change! Just stopped in Farranfore. A lot of special needs people got on the bus so hopefully Ms. Queen Pussy will decide to stop looking at that picture! 

NOPE

Wow. 
By the end of this bus ride I will be a gynecologist. 
At least she shaved for the photo.



12.23pm
Currently trying not to vomit. Live blogging was not a good idea. I can't read or write on buses or any moving vehicle as I get motion sickness. 

I get motion sickness hard. 

Woman in front better watch herself and her steel cave or she'll find herself swimming in a pool of my puke. Also trying to get the bus WiFi working on my phone as I took a lovely blurry photo to go with this blog post and cannot be bothered digging out my usb lead. Laziness!
Finally reaching Killarney now, what a lovely and peaceful town with a constant smell of horse shit hanging around! I do actually love it here though. 

OH FOR GOD'S SAKE! 
WOMAN.
PUT AWAY YOUR PUSSY.

Actually this is better than I thought! I can read the personals she's going through, in between her little asexual porno sessions, that is.
"Genuine gentleman seeks to please"
I bet he won't be seeking long after he gets a mouthful of metal. 

Im gonna eat a sandwich now.

WHOA. 
Suddenly, worse pictures appear!
Fuck me, I didn't think I'd be getting dinner and a show!
There isn't an empty hole on the poor lass on her screen right now. Wow.
This is the best bus ride ever.


12.38pm
Still looking at the lady's screen. Is this illegal? It's just immoral as far as I know, but in fairness it's right in front of me and it's too bright to look outside. Currently resisting the urge to quickly set up an account on the site she's on and start messaging her. For the craic of course. Purely the craic.
Oh wow! She just messaged a guy; 
"IS DAT YOUR PENIS???????"
I smell an Autumnal Romance blossoming! 

It was love at first genital picture exchange.
This is a beautiful thing guys. 
"It has a nice shape 2 it".
You can't make this up.



1.02pm.
Queen Vag in front of me is still at it. An old man in the front of the bus just turned around, took a bite of his banana and turned back. I am never eating again.

Old people eating; Nature's appetite suppressant.

Speaking of appetite suppression, Lady Puss in front of me is eating a crunchie bar. Sorry Cadbury's, you've lost a valued customer. 
Giving up on sorting out the WiFi, no pictures guys! Sorry! 

What will she tell her friends when they ask how the trip was? 
"The bus was fine, just went on my laptop and sent people pictures of my metal-mouthed Cheshire Cat. Oh and I had a crunchie bar." 
Now she's playing Farmville. 
Wow.


1.21pm
Silver-lined Sewer Pipe is still playing Farmville. Seems she's good at keeping all her fields clear, wink wink. 
Nearly in Macroom now. God I hate Macroom. It seems so dull and grey, like a place an animal would go to die. My stomach isn't as bad as what it was, so that's good! Probably directly linked to the lack of vagina in front of me right now. I think I'm really desensitised to it now, actually. I give the odd glance at her screen, see a vagina and don't even bat an eyelid. Not sure how I feel about this new development. We just passed a pub called "The Auld Triangle". Timing.


1.30pm
My stomach, she aches. I need to stop blogging right now. Ow. Nothing else has happened anyways, Lady Labia has resigned herself to a relaxing game of Mahjong. No more puss-puss it would seem!
Im gonna leave it here before I make this bus look like an abattoire. Motion sickness ruins everything. 


SIDE NOTE!
It looks like I really dislike this woman and her sexual...habits? I really don't! In fact, I think it's brilliant! As long as she's safe and enjoys herself, what's the harm in a woman being so sexually liberated? More power to her! 

I salute you, Queen Clitoris!
Thank you for making this the best bus ride ever! 

Je t'aime toujours,
Evan.


aka
World's Most Nosy Person






Motivation Station

Hello there!
It's been a while! Too long, in fact. I'm not even going to lie to you, valued reader!
I haven't been rushing around off my feet, I haven't been working hard. The main reason I haven't posted in so long is a 10-letter word that rhymes with Procrastination.

Masturbation!

Obviously not.
Go back and count how many letters there are in masturbation and don't be fooled so easily next time!

The word is MOTIVATION.

This is my major, if only, flaw in my otherwise perfect being.
My hamartia, if you will. (Leaving Cert English woo)

The purpose of today's post is to try and explain why I haven't been posting (if you even care that much) and to provide an insight into what stops me. It's very self-preachy (that makes little sense) and it's not really funny, more serious, so if you want to read on, be my guest but I wouldn't be offended if you decide to skip it.


At the risk of sounding vain, I could do absolutely anything I wanted. Anything. I know I have the Charisma, Uniqueness, Nerve and Talent (C.U.N.T.)  to be the very best at anything I want to. Except I'm lazy as.....as....um....*insert lazy metaphor here*
Even writing this is like drawing blood from a stone, it's so hard to inspire and motivate myself to put words to page, especially so when I have no idea where I'm going with this.

I always thought it was such a design flaw that humans are built that way. Our brains are wired to fall at the easiest hurdle and give up. I could be living a much better life with much nicer things and an easier time with education if it weren't for this strange mental block that exists in my brain for no reason and that my brain can't sort out. It's like a fart in your face from your own asshole. It doesn't make sense.



I see plenty of people with...lesser ability...doing so much better than myself, purely because they have the drive and determination to strive for whatever they put their minds to. That was one of the most egocentric thing I have ever posted, I think.

Meanwhile, I am here with all the tools I need for success laying at my fingertips and I can't even bother myself to pick them up. You would think that seeing other people's motivation would spark up some modicum of drive in me but no, the opposite is true. I see other people's motivation and it sucks the willpower out of me stronger than Madonna sucks the youth out of newborn babies.

This problem with motivation permeates throughout every aspect of my life. I remember entering 6th year of secondary school and thinking; "Ok, time to get my act together and work hard for a good college course!" Shortly afterwards I dropped to the ground, drooling and writhing in my own lack of motivation and stayed that way until the night before every exam, cramming and beating myself over the head with books to see if knowledge sticks. It doesn't. I told myself after all that stress that college will be different. I will work hard and succeed. Then I told that to myself again after cramming for the 1st year exams. Then again after cramming for the 2nd year exams. One more time I told myself after the repeat exams and now I find myself saying it again on the cusp of 3rd year. If I were a racehorse, I would run to the first hurdle and stop short. I'd also probably nibble the leaves on the fence of the hurdle. I'm glad I'm not a racehorse.

The great paradox of motivation is that to become motivated, you need to be driven in the first place. You can have as much desire and want in the world and it still won't be enough unless you put yourself into action.   It's like you're sitting in your car and you don't have the key. You must mentally hot-wire yourself.
I don't currently have the tools to push myself, and if I do, I don't know how to use them. You can throw a million inspirational quotes at me and they bounce back like pennies off a stripper's asscrack. I could wistfully stare at myself in a mirror for a million hours and nothing would come out of it, except perhaps an even more bloated sense of self-importance.


I need to try and fix this, if anything so I can drive myself to work harder in college, to not let myself or others down and to provide a better life for myself. For now I will work on the little things to try and get myself used to pushing through mental blocks and I will keep trying to update this blog.

Thanks for understanding!
Gosh that was fiercely serious!

BITCHEZZZZZZZZZZ!

xoxoFabulissaxoxo

aka
Evan!


Thursday, August 23, 2012

WOW Web Picks 2!

POOOOOOOOOOOO
Poo

(ps, poo)

Hello! 
After a long hiatus of like 3 minutes, I have returned for another post! It's gonna be short, soz goys!
I was gone for so long due to repeat college exams, funtimes.

I have another in the afternoon tomorrow (today?) but I can't study anymore, my brain is going to burst!
Not from knowledge, I have extreme hydroencephalitis. I spelled that correctly on the first go! WOW!

So what I googled it to see if it was the right brain condition I was thinking of? Nobody's perfect! Except for me! 
(My boyfie tells me so all the time. Spoiled so I am!)


ANYWAYS! Enough dicking about!

Time for another installment of WOW WEB PICKS!!!111!!111!!oneoneeleeven!!2!


The webs had slim pickings for me over the past while and I didn't spend too much time looking for stuff, I was too busy crying and beating myself with a stick for not studying more for my exams!
(I call the stick Mr. Shamey!)




ANYWAYS PART TWO: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO
(Anyways is my most used word I think)




WOW Web Pick #1
Staggering Beauty

Ok, if you have epilepsy or just have a fear of bright flashing things I would strongly advise you not to click this link.
BUT FUCK THAT! You're gonna do it anyway! 

Basically an extremely phallic wiggly-wormy thing shakes to the path of your mouse cursor.

SHAKE IT FAST!

I don't know if Staggering Beauty is old or if I accidentally robbed this from someone (happens all the time, I am a content bandito) then I apologise profusely from all of my bodily cavities!



It was phallic enough!! I had to....




It doesn't actually look like that, just click the link and see for yourself.

*foams at mouth, has amazing seizure, retains elegance and grace throughout*



WOW Web Pick #2


Originally a game created by Activision in 1986 for several platforms, Alter Ego is a life-simulation game now playable in your browser through YE OLDE MEGA SCIEYNCE WONDERE TECHNOLOGIYE
Shakespeare!
Anyone friends with me on facebook has probably seen me talk about this before.

This game is so much fun, from getting mega-STIs off prozzies to drinking yourself to death to ignoring your suicidal friends, the fun never stops!

The game also has some fun life scenarios such as this;

Seems perfectly safe!
WALK OVER






Well this just can't end badly!
GET IN THE CAR



Aw :(
NEW GAME
See how much fun this is? 







WOW Web Pick #3

Aw boyeees! This is so lovely! Basically this guy mixes loads of sounds from films and turns them into pretty cool tracks! 

Just listen;




As if you needed an excuse to play this video anyways!


This guy has been around a long time too so if you already know about this, soz bbz! 
The Alice one is really trippy and interesting, as it should be I guess! 


Anyways!
Thats it for this time guys and gals! And those lovely people in between genders! 

I know this was a particularly short and boring post but I felt I had to write something seeing as how I've been gone a while, so I just threw something together for everyone! 
(Everyone = 4 readers, I'm up 1 since last time)

Next post will hopefully be better as I should have some time on my hands to better further this blog!



CYA L8R QT PIES!
How cool was that?


BOY!






Monday, August 13, 2012

WOW Web Picks!

Hey there fellow internet users and computer owners!


Anyways!

I'm bored tonight and not studying as per usual so what else to do but POST!!


POST! (post!)


First off, I want to thank everyone who has read and is reading this blog!
I only set it up a few days ago but already I have 300+ views! WOW! I'm so grateful to all of you, everyone has been saying such kind things and giving great feedback! I would hug all of you if I could! And I want to because I love hugs! If you hate hugs you are either Hitler or gay! Yes I went there!! 
And now the post!




I hate saying this but browsing for crap on the internet is what i spend at least 10000 hours a day doing.
Saying "browsing the internet" is possibly the most self-degrading thing you can say is your hobby. 
BUT ALAS!

Back to the topic at hand!

If the title of the post didn't clue you in, this post is going to be about random things I find on the web!
Also if the title didn't clue you in, you must be 

a) blind (in which case i dunno how you're reading this)
b) very inattentive! (you must be bad at school!)

The picks this time around all seem to have a musical theme, I hope you don't mind a bit of listening!




So fire up those 56k modems and strap yourself in!
Strap yourself into the modem! Technology!







WOW Web Pick #1
Codependent - Gold Diggin' Divas

Ok, this is actually an old thing for me. (hipster)
I first saw this a year ago so if you've seen this it's probably cause I already posted it to every social network site I'm on (at least 20 million)
But for the uninformed!

Feminists be warned! You thought I was bad? Turns out sometimes women themselves make the suffragettes roll in their cute pink coffins!

Listen carefully to the beautiful lyrics, amazing rap skills and hilarious voice cracking throughout!

Damn you, Albert Mason Group! Whoever you are!



WOW. WOWOWOW.
Is this not one of the best things ever? I'm fairly sure the lady on the right of the champagne bottles shouldn't be considered a Gold Diggin Diva purely because she doesn't do a lot rapping. Or maybe she's just the shy Gold Diggin Diva. Who knows? 

Why isn't this a chart topper?


Best moment: Skip to 1.00 and just listen. 
"Chanel, Gucci, dependant how we loooOOOooOOok" 
What.






WOW Web Pick #2
Losing You - Jan Terri

Oh my! Again something i saw ages ago. I am a big hipster soz bbz. 
This is one of my favourite things ever. Seriously. Everyone needs to watch this right now. 


No, Jan Terri. Just no.


Its like watching a big pile of slop wander around the place. Cheapest music video i ever saw I think.
The lyrics are what really make this special though:

"My heart is like an open book, and yours is closed"
"We were like a merry-go-round, going around in circlesssssssss"

My dream is that one day le boyfie will stand outside my window with this blasting out of a tape cassette player, serenading me. I will swoon. 

Best Moment: I genuinely can't pick, it's all golden! I do have a special place in my heart for the part where the camera zooms in on a "No Parking" sign and her BADASS Italian Stallion (or male prostitute) has parked there. WOW.







WOW Web Pick #3
Journey to Mars - Jan Terri

I KNOW! Jan Terri AGAIN! I'm sorry! I can be so lazy! But at the same time, I wouldn't have to post Jan twice here if she could make at least one music video that isn't shit. Seriously, see for yourself:

BEAM ME UP SCOTTY! Sorry love, I don't think
there's enough beams to lift you :(



Isn't it just magical? Enchanting? Between the high quality stock footage of random sci fi space scenes, the vomit inducing filters and glamorous outfits, I really do feel like I'm on a crazy journey to Mars with Jan Terri in my ear telling me to have fun. 
Seriously though, she looks like a potato covered in foil and ready for the oven. 


"It will be a wild adventuuuuuure!
It will be funnnnnnnnnnn!"

Classic.



Best Moment: Oh god, again there are so many! The "spaceship" they ride on (it's a train), the FUTURISTIC fairground setting, beam me up Scotty, the kickass guitars, they're all classic. The lyrics though, wow. I can't pick sorry! 







WOW Web Pick #4
Chinese Folk Song?? 


I have no idea what part of Asia they come from so I'm gonna be very bad and assume China.

Sorry guys, I dunno the name of this, again I found this last year sometime and proceeded to wet myself.
This Hot Stud is probably the best thing to come out of Asia since Asia was built in the 40's.






I know the video is long, just watch as much
as you want to! Or as much high pitched
cat noises as your ears will endure! FUNTIMES




It's truly amazing, watch the total player in the middle try and sex up those 2 lovely ladies with his elegant and manly singing voice. Listen as the ladies reply with high pitched shrieks that one can only assume mean:

"All my girl babies were taken off me! Please help! Take me away from China k plz tnx!"

Best Moment: Ok I didn't watch it all so I probably missed so many, but I just love at 1.23 when they have what appears to be some light banter and the man goes back to sexing these 2 broads up. Its beautiful in it's simplicity, really.







WOW Web Pick#5
We Like Pizza - Pizza Kids

Christ I love this SO MUCH. 
Just watch.


That's right, they DO have pizza in the Eastern Bloc! Nothing says cool like a girl in double denim giving you a thumbs up! And that kid with his racing fleece and slick hairdo! These kids could be the new One Direction! Although this song doesn't have the best message. I'm sure if this was played on the radio a sweeping trend of obesity would take over the world. Well, even more obesity than there is already.

I can imagine these kids sitting in an agent's office, wide-eyed and hopeful:

"Yeah kids, you guys are gonna be famous. This song is gonna take over the whole world. Everyone's gonna want a slice of the Pizza Kids! That's your new slogan. *To secretary* HEY can we get some denim jackets in here? Everyone loves kids in double denim. You guys are gonna rock the world."

Best Moment: All of it. Every single word.
"Weeee lik pitza, in de murning, we lik pitza every day!" 
Those accents you guys. Brilliant.

WE GET IT YOU LIKE PIZZA. 









Ok guys! These are my web pics for the moment! Expect LOADS more posts like these, I have a seriously large stockpile of bookmarks of crap I look at on the good ole interwebulars! 


Thanks for reading! Share on facebook and tell all your friends! 

BOYEEE!


Saturday, August 11, 2012

Music For Stalkers!

Hey Desperados! 

(The beer that thinks it's tequila when really it tastes like fungal sock drippings! BUY IT!)


It is her boot juices.

Such lovely imagery to open with!


Right now I can't sleep, the weight of the world is on my shoulders. 
But not really! 
I just stayed up late last night and my sleeping pattern is now ruined! YAY


I was listening to Mariah Carey's Touch My Body earlier, it always makes me laugh because

a) I always imagine someone listening to it, slowly swaying side to side and twiddling their nipples

(I think I have mental issues guys)

and

b) This legendary version. "Tuts My Barreh" 

 "Throw Me On The Bay!" He likes it rougher than most.


If you combine the 2 you get one seriously scarring mental image (or sexy, its up to you)

But anyways!
While I was listening to this song I couldn't stop thinking about how it sounds really creepy! Like some sort of sexual assault/stalker/murder song! (not to mention a chart topping hit!)


That lead me to think about other songs that could be a bit.....open to misinterpretation...

So without further adieu, ado or whatever one of those words is correct!


EVAN'S SONGS FOR STALKERS/MURDERERS/CREEPS!
(no fun acronym this time guys, soz)

Song #1

Seriously guys, this song makes Mariah Carey sound like a psychotic creep. Taking the lyrics out of context here transforms Mariah from just a plain ole horny slutbag into a fat oily man with a greasy mouth who touches himself to your facebook profile pictures. (we all get lonely sometimes)



Mariah seen here with her bodyguards at the launch
party for her new single "I Wanna Taste Your Heartbeat"


For instance:

"In my imagination I'd be all up on you..."

(Nooo...)

"If there's a camera up in here then it's gonna leave with me when I do...."

(Please stop Mariah....)

"If you run your mouth and brag about this secret rendezvous, I will hunt you down"

(HELP)


Mariah's private "Recording Studio"


WHOA. Mariah! Calm down!

The second verse especially makes sure you never want to meet Mariah Carey down a dark alley at night (and I hear she always hangs out in them)

"Boy you can put me on you like a brand new white tee, I'll hug your body tighter than my favourite jeans"

Here Mariah implies she is going to somehow skin herself, fashion a tshirt from her flesh and force her poor victim to wear it. Is there no end to her madness??




Song #2
The Police - Every Breath You Take

Ok, I know, this was the obvious choice. I'm not even gonna link to it, you all know it. 
But really I don't think you can write about stalker songs without including the most well-known!

Imagine you are sitting at home alone at night, enjoying a movie, when suddenly the phone rings....


OH MY GOD! STING IS ON THE PHONE! *girly screams*


"Hello?"

"Every breath you take and every move you make....."

"Who is this??"

"Oh can't you see you belong to me...."

"Why are you doing this to me??"

"I'LL BE WATCHING YOU"

"AIEEEEEEEEEEE"



The only Police this song should be associated with.





Song #3
And I am Telling You I'm Not Going - Jennifer Holliday

I actually linked that to the Glee version, I prefer it haha.

Anyway, I don't know what's going on here but whoa Jenny needs to tone it down a bit, it sounds like she has Stockholm syndrome that's turning into an obsession: 

"I'm not livin' without you, I don't wanna be free, I'm staying..."

There's some sort of incest or something mixed in here too;

"We both share the same blood..."

Jennifer is getting a bit full on now, wanting to somehow become one with her (now regretful) captors:

" We both have the same mind "

She's gonna get violent if she doesn't get her way...

"Stop all the rivers, push, strike and kill, I'm not gonna leave you, There's no way I will!"

Please....Jennifer.....we're letting you go....please go home...

NO! HULK SMASH
(I don't know where that came from)



So that's it for now anyway guys! 

I might do some more on stalker songs or songs with misinterpretations at some stage. If I can think of them that is! :D 

In the meantime, please please please share this blog if you're enjoying what you're reading so far, I'm having a hard time getting views and establishing a readership, early days yet I know but why wait?

Another way to help is to kidnap a group of your friends and promise them freedom if they can get me 1000 views in a day! That's what I'll be doing later on in the year anyway! :D 

Anything else you wanna know just post a comment or ask me on twitter! (my twitter feed is on the top right up there somewhere, ah you'll find it sure!) 

Thanks for reading!
BOYYEEEE! 


Thursday, August 9, 2012

Things I Love (and getting carried away by Drag Queens)

Hey Bay-Bays!

Back again for another post, are we? Just barging in here doing what you like, are you? You are the bane of my existence, do you know that? 

As I'm typing this I'm having a cigarette (home-rolled, fuckers!) and a can of cheap cider and I'm also eating a pear. (healthy lifestyle choices you guys
You cannot begin to imagine how Lordly and Regal I look right now. (not very)



I should be sleeping to get up early to study tomorrow BUT NO! Unlike most other bloggers who are too busy with their own trivial little things like having friends and having a life, I am dedicated to bringing you only the finest blogs/Sister Sister fanfiction at any hour you should so require! 
(sister sister is one of the best shows ever you guys you should all watch every episode right now forever
(Also I am not skilled enough to write Sister Sister fanfiction, I'm sorry D: )

But anyhow, the point of this big fucker of a blog post is to introduce you to the 3 main categories of things I love. 
(Yes I have the capacity to love! just ask YOUR MOM! WHOA)
(Late 90's/early 00's comebacks for the winzzzsssszzzzz)




ANY FUCKING WAY.


Things I Love!

(This is probably going to be a bit of a rarity in these parts seeing as how I hate everything/everyone/you also)


You're probably thinking 

"But you're so nice! How can someone as beautiful, eloquent, talented AND amazing as you hate everything?"

Oh, you weren't thinking that? (fine fuck off crabface)


If you don't believe I hate most things, I hope in time to show you that I do indeed!
(you wont stick around that long though SOB SOB SOB)


Why do I make it sound as if it's an achievement being a crabby little fucker? DUNNO! 


ANY FUCKING WAY (Take 2!)

Hang on to your fine-lace stockings, readers! You're in for a wild ride!






This is about as wild as it gets.
PS I think they're dead you guys someone
should really poke them with a stick to make sure



(By the way is that not THE LOVELIEST FUCKING picture ever!! It's so lovely i could just shit!!)




Ok, here we go! 


Things I Love #1
FOOD

I LOVE FOOD. And i know that technically you can say everyone loves food (except those bastard anorexics) but I can bet I love it more! I think the only people who love food more than me are Oprah and Kirstie Alley! I have spent more hours watching cookery shows than Judge Judy has spent giving out to young minorities and white thrash! AND SHES BEEN AROUND SINCE THE DAWN OF TIME. (Who do you think sentenced Jesus to death, huh?)






She is the greatest woman in the history of women



I eat everything! Except mushrooms and raisins but even so I still eat them in things. The one thing I will not eat is shellfish. I love crab and lobster is ok but I would puke all over a bowl of oysters and mussels. (not that anyone would notice, they looks so rotten)

Isn't this dirty rock creature just SO APPETISING?





Chocolate is my biggest vice. (Ugh how predictable
Cover anything in chocolate and I will eat it! Insects, vegetables even your mother's cooking! 
(Apply cold water to the burn wound for 10 - 15 minutes)
My friend once said that a third of all your income is spent on food. 
(I think it was a third, I wasn't listening properly
In my case at least 90% percent is spent on food and the other 10% spent on tobacco and the last 10% spent on alcohol.
(I'm bad at maths you guys)




Things I Love #2
CATS

OH GOD! I love cats so much! I am a crazy cat lady trapped in a fat boy's body trapped in a slender guys body! Cats are so beyond cute! Except Sphynx cats. They should be burned at the stake for crimes against...cat-humanity...? (I am bad at words tonight)
Once I had 15 cats. FIFTEEN. So many kittens. In the end I had them made into a fur coat. 
Not really though! My most favourite cat that I ever had (and I've had millions) was named Phoebe and I still miss her cause she was just so lovely! (sob sob sob)

I don't have a picture of her at hand but
I think she looked kinda like this


Now!
Look at this cat! LOOK AT IT DAMN YOU!
Tell me you don't love it forever!! I just wanna bop it on the nose and rub my face all over its belly! BECAUSE I LOVE CATS. (non-sexually! :D :D :D )



Cats 4 Life






Things I love #3
DRAG QUEENS!

Oh guys oh guys oh guys oh dear I'm too excited! TOO EXCITED! I am not really a stereotypical gay guy at all but when drag queens are involved you better watch out! 
(YOU BETTAH WERK!
(sorry)

I love drag queens so much! and I love androgynous boys and boys who wear make up and dresses but aren't drag queens or transvestites, like genderfuckery! (PS I love all these types of people in a non-sexual way :D )
I spend hours every week just watching videos of guys putting on makeup and nails. I don't know why! I don't want to be an androgynous boy! (drag queen, maybe)
I am just absolutely enthralled! I would surround myself with these people and just talk and listen to them cause they are all so interesting!

Oh what the heck! I'm just gonna list off my top 4!


"Delightfully Resplendent Androgynous Guys" (DRAG for short!)

DRAG #4
Michael James!
Oh hes so intelligent and lovely and has some great looks! Like Kefka from Final Fantasy 6:

I adore his videos on his youtube channel, he has some great insights, so wise! His style is definitely dark and almost evil! 
Oh isn't he just wonderful! 


DRAG #3
Gregory Gorgeous!
Oh My God! He's so funny! I always die laughing at his videos! And he has some lovely looks! His style is so girly girl compared with Michael James'. I would love to be his friend! BAWWW

oooh fierce!

DRAG #2
Sutan Amrull AKA Raja Gemini!
Guhhh! One of my idols! I love Raja ever so much! All his looks are very modern, off the wall, sometimes daring and always glamourous. Also has a music video, I don't like the song that much but the video melts me every time! 
It. Is. Too. FIERCE.

I die. The ferocity.


DRAG #1 
RuPaul!
Could it have been anyone else? My Goddess! I want to know him in real life. So badly. 
If I ever met her in real life i would have a stroke and shit myself! 
Supermodel of the World and a true founder of the modern drag world, RuPaul!

Everyone needs to go watch RuPaul's Drag Race right now ok

OK WOW GUYS sorry for boring the 3 day old knickers off you with my rambling and bawwwing over all them fierce divas! 
(I cant believe i just typed that *sigh*)


To make up for it, here is a bad picture of me when I had long hair and there is also some crazy things happening in the picture

This is not edited in the least I swear




I think I should just leave it here for now! I will end up just writing continuously about drag queens. 

So now you know a little bit more about me! LETS BE FRIENDS

Thanks for reading guys! Come back soon!

OR DIEEEEEE............




Nah.


Bye!